Why elementary school is not like the real world.....
*In elementary school, the teacher takes the rubber snake away from Billy and makes him share with Sally. In the real world, the boss doesn't care who is right, the raise or business trip goes to the whiniest baby that spends all of his/her time sucking up.
*In elementary school, the playground bully usually grows up to be the loser town drunk. In real life, the office bully ends up being the office manager, then district manager and then Lord Tsar Admiral High Supreme Ruler of All Land East and West of the Mississip, esquire.
*In elementary school, you can buy cool school supplies with your favorite movie or cartoon characters on them. In real life, you look like a darn fool if you try to sign a contract with a pink Hello Kitty highlighter and co-workers just can't respect those Spongebob file folders.
*In elementary school, a sticker from the teacher makes everything better. In the real world, it takes a 3-day weekend and a dumptruck full of Cheetos to make the world seem right again.
*In elementary school, you get a free ride to and from school every day. In real life, the only thing free about the carpool is the cigarette smoke and the Tim McGraw song that keeps getting stuck in your head.
*In elementary school, you can bring a seashell to school for show and tell. In the real world, if you bring something cool to show everyone, it gets stolen during your first coffee break and ends up on eBay for 1.99.
*In elementary school, you get a hot lunch everyday. In the real world, you get a hot tuna salad sandwich because the workroom fridge is on the fritz...again.
*In elementary school, you fake sick and your mom buys it. In the real world, you go into work leaning on your IV pole and no one even looks up.
No comments:
Post a Comment